Got back from Rhodes this morning. I can see my podgy belly hanging over my pants. The holiday was absolutely lovely, the hotel was nice and the weather was unbeatable. It was incessant sunshine everyday and was stifling hot. Luckily where we positioned the sunbeds was directly infront of a ice cold shower so cooling off during the day was quite easy. The only downside was that the ground was razor sharp pebbles which pretty much cut your feet to shreds but after a couple of anesthetic drinks you didn't really notice much.

This was my view as I had the arduous tasks of basking in the sun all day.

The hotel was really faultless and the food was lovely as my expanded gut would suggest.

We hired a car and spent the first day doing the cultural stuff and the second the fun stuff. The first day we went to lindos which is a bay which is characterized by little white houses. There is a huge castle there sitting majestically on the cliffs presiding of the town and an amphitheatre cut into the cliff itself.

The afternoon was spent in Rhodes Town looking at the huge cruise ships docked in the port with such inspirational names like Queen of the Seas. The town itself was bustling and was full of little enticing jewelry shops and clothes shops which stock rather unusual items for this time of year, namely fur coats and soft leather jackets. Personally I wouldn't wear fur coats but the 100 degree heat must have been quite chilly for some people. The jewelry shops had glittering displays of gorgeous gems dazzling in the sun, it was only the pushy sales people who put you off as they went in for the kill if you came within 50 feet of their shop.

The second day was very different. The best part of the day was spent at Faliraki Water park which was great and as you probably guessed you got very very wet.

This was definitely my favorite, The Raft Ride. As the name suggests you go in a rubber tubing slipping and sliding down each corner until you come out looking absolutely DRENCHED!!!! The afternoon was spent in a quaint little taverna up in the mountains which served the most memorable baguette I have ever had, I will be dreaming of it for many years to come.

The rest of the holiday was spent lazing round the pool drinking a multitude of alcoholic potions and reading or sleeping. The evenings were spent watching the vast array of entertainment provided by the hotel. This involved one extremely bored German rep who for the whole of the kids mini disco had a look of total and understandable contempt. The adults entertainment positively took your breathe away and not with excitement. It consisted of :-

Sunday = Nothing

Monday = Belly Dancing (quoted as coming from Baghdad, but she was ginger???)

Tuesday = Bingo (spent 5 Euro and only got 5 out of the 18 numbers on the card, funny how the reps girlfriend won the prize)

Wednesday = Sword Thrower ( Must have had 20 costume changes in a 90 minute show)

Thursday = Greek Night ( By far the best night haven't got anything to complain about this one only that it didn't go on for long enough)

Friday = What a surprise, Karaoke (Only one family actually did it and they went up time and time again, they obviously thought that they had the chance to be x factor. I wish I could have been Simon Cowell and sent them packing)

Saturday = Cabaret Night ( Dances from the musicals, the only one I recognized was Grease and that was the hair pieces and the fact that their t - shirts had the logo written in glitter "GRACE".

I had a great time and would go back again, Rhodes was a lovely place and had some fantastic scenery. The only problem now is that I have to pay for things.